Who’s more stressed about GCSEs? You or your child?
The GCSE period is a stressful time, not just for students, but for parents too. You’ve watched your child work (or perhaps procrastinate!) their way through the year, and now the exams are looming. It’s natural to feel anxious about their performance, but in these final days, your role is to be a source of support and calm, not another source of pressure.
The Revision Ship Has Sailed (Mostly)
Let’s be honest, if your child hasn’t put in the revision hours you hoped for, there’s little that can be done in the days leading up to the exams to drastically change the outcome. Piling on extra pressure now will likely backfire, leading to increased anxiety, decreased confidence, and potentially even poorer performance.
Instead, focus on what can be controlled: creating a calm and supportive environment.
What To Say (and What Not To Say)
AVOID:
“You should have started revising earlier!” (This is unhelpful and only increases guilt.)
“If you don’t get good grades, you won’t…” (Avoid making future prospects sound bleak.)
“I’m so disappointed in you.” (This is the worst thing you can say.)
Constantly quizzing them or checking their revision schedule.
Instead, try:
“I’m here for you, no matter what.” (Unconditional support is crucial.)
“Do you need anything? A snack? A break?” (Offer practical assistance.)
“Remember to breathe and take things one step at a time.” (Encourage mindfulness.)
“I’m proud of you for getting this far.” (Acknowledge their effort, regardless of the outcome.)
“Let’s focus on what you can do now.” (Encourage a positive, forward-looking approach.)
“How are you feeling?” (Open the door for them to express their anxieties.)
Practical Support: Beyond the Words
Words are important, but actions speak louder.
Here are some practical ways to support your child:
Create a Calm Environment: Minimise household noise and distractions during study periods.
Healthy Meals and Snacks: Ensure they’re eating nutritious food to fuel their brain. Avoid sugary snacks that lead to energy crashes.
Encourage Breaks: Remind them to take regular breaks, even if it’s just for 10 minutes to stretch, listen to music or go for a short walk.
Sleep is Key: Prioritise sleep. A well-rested mind performs better.
Limit Screen Time (Outside of Revision): Excessive screen time can increase anxiety and disrupt sleep.
Help with Practicalities: Offer to drive them to exams, prepare their exam kit (pens, pencils, calculator), and ensure they know the exam schedule.
Be a Listening Ear: Sometimes, all they need is someone to listen to their worries without judgment.
Managing Your Own Anxiety
It’s okay to be anxious about your child’s exams. However, it’s crucial to manage your own anxiety so it doesn’t transfer to your child. Talk to your partner, a friend, or another parent if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Remember, your child needs you to be their rock, not another source of stress.
The Bigger Picture
Remind yourself and your child that GCSEs are not the be-all and end-all. There are many paths to success, and grades don’t define a person’s worth. Focus on celebrating their effort and resilience, regardless of the results.
After the exams
The period after the exams can be just as stressful as the lead-up. Be prepared for mood swings, exhaustion and perhaps a bit of “exam blues.” Continue to offer support and encouragement. Help them plan some fun activities to look forward to.
Ultimately, your love and support are the most valuable assets you can offer your child during this challenging time. By creating a calm and supportive environment, you can help them navigate the GCSE period with confidence and resilience.
Leave a Reply